Quote of the Day - April 30, 2008

In times of great stress or adversity, it's always best to keep busy, to plow your anger and your energy into something positive.

- Lee Iacocca

Quote of the Day - April 12, 2008

Please don't tell me to relax - it's only my tension that's holding me together.

- Ashleigh Brilliant

It's That Time Again!

Time to learn the day's lesson from the Wheel of Morality? Er, not exactly. It's the Christmas shopping season. You've kept your spending in check all year by avoiding shopping all together. But now you venture to the stores to get gifts for others.

While trying to think about what your friends and family would want, you see everything you'd forgotten you wanted. On sale. Sometimes, you can buy it for a friend with a mutual interest, thus fulfilling your need for a present and your need to buy what you want. You still won't have it (unless you find something else that's better for that person, then maybe you'll keep it ;)), but so far you've managed to use your impulse buying constructively.

However, the more time you spend in the store, the more things you see. Oooh! I want that! Oh, I didn't know that was out yet! Hey, this is the new one! I've heard good things...

You force yourself to step back. You look at your list again. One person down, and you have four things in your hand. You put the three that were for you back and take a deep breath. Wait until the season is over. There needs to be things left on your wish list by the end of this shopping trip so that other people will know what to get you. If you don't get it, well, buy it in February when you should have seen everyone who will get you something.

You manage to find gifts for several people on your list, then move on to the next store. Here, the temptation is more serious. You see something you've been meaning to buy - something you actually need and that no one will get for you for Christmas because no one knows you need it or it's the kind of thing you need to get a feel for before you know it meets your needs or the item is just a tad outside most people's present budget. You decide that if you don't get it now, you might not be able to find it when you go looking for it, so you gather it into your arms, then grab a random inexpensive present for someone who wasn't even on your list just to justify having come into the store in the first place.

At the end of day one, you've managed to get presents for only a few people and you do not look forward to facing temptation again. So you turn to online shopping. You can update your wish list with all the things you didn't buy that day and then get some more expensive presents at lower prices. But when you go to update your wish list, you see that something you've been waiting over a year to buy is on sale. You regretted not buying it the last time the price went that low, and it's been on your list for long enough that if someone was going to get it for you, they would have, so you click "add to cart" and go browsing for more presents.

But at the end of the day, there are still people on your list. Sure, you managed to knock a couple of more people off, but now you have to return something because you found a better price online, which means you have to venture to the brick-and-mortars again anyway, so you might as well make tomorrow round two.

You manage to return the item you found a better price for without making additional purchases at the store. But then you find a nice little non-chain store that you hadn't known about before that turns out to have lots of things you didn't even know you could buy anymore. Things you've been looking for for years. Things your friends already have but you don't. You grab one item, knowing perfectly well it's for you. They're low on something else, so you grab the last ones for friends. Your basket fills. Your list gets smaller.

At the end of day two, you're down to the peripherals of your list. One or two people that you usually get something small, plus a gift exchange party or two. The "small gift" people you might not see until after the holiday, so you decide to hold off until post-holiday sales. For the gift exchanges, you consider riffling through your DVD collection for stuff you don't watch anymore. You wonder if the duplicate magnetic poetry set you have is under the price floor. Finally, however, you decide to grab something while you're getting food to prepare for various holiday potlucks.

The grocery store doesn't exactly have the best selection of presents, so you grab a few random holiday items that add up to the price minimum and throw them in a stocking. Voila! Instant generic present. While you're at it, you buy some candy for yourself to eat, insisting that you'll share it a work. If you don't go through the whole bag tonight by yourself.

By the end of the week, your shopping is done. You refuse to add up the receipts because you want to live in denial just a little while longer, at least until after the New Year, when you'll resolve to spend less, eat less, and exercise more. Lather, rinse, repeat.

They're Spying on Me!

The Avatar writers have apparently been spying on me the last couple of weeks. Never mind that this episode was written and animated months ago. The first few minutes of this clip is so where I've been (especially -7:40 to -6:55). I feel for you, Aang. Thank goodness for the end of daylight savings time. Now if only we could add an extra hour every weekend.

Help Wanted: Minions

Integration and testing is quickly approaching. I’m taking two masters classes during the week. And I’m playing football and basketball on the weekends. Eating and sleeping have already taken a back seat, and I’m not even into the thick of it yet. Pretty soon, I’ll be squeezing my games in before, after, or even during work, since I’ll apparently be working seven days a week. Homework will have to be completed while waiting for a compile to finish. I’ll need to buy more clothes to space out my laundry days further. But since I probably won't be cooking much, at least I won’t have too many dishes. And that’s assuming all goes according to plan. So I’ve decided that I need minions. Do you think Career Builder would post this?

SpakKadi, a computer engineer currently in the process of taking over a TBD world on which to build her New Society, is seeking minions to do her bidding.

Job Title: Junior Minion
Job Description: The Junior Minion will be responsible for small but inconvenient tasks such as bringing groceries up from the car, changing the sheets, doing the dishes, doing laundry, dusting and vacuuming. With time, responsibilities may expand to include cooking and cleaning the kitchen and bathroom. Benefits include a roof over your head and life lessons about pulling your own weight around here.

Job Title: Technical Minion
Job Description: The Technical Minion is responsible for performing tedious technical tasks that distract from more interesting technical design and problem solving. Tasks may include writing documentation, writing procedures, writing test programs, and supporting small, uncomplicated design components. The Technical Minion may also be used to deflect other designers who have no concept of “schedule” or “hardware limitations”. Benefits include a deeper understanding of the technical details and a trusted place at my side when I’m in charge.

Job Title: Gopher Minion
Job Description: The Gopher Minion is responsible for various tasks that require going to places outside the big four (work, school, home, sports field). Tasks include grocery shopping, going to the bank, gassing up the car, and acquiring food at meal times. With time, responsibilities may expand to include paying bills and shuffling fellow minions from place to place.

Job Title: Chief Minion
Job Description: The Chief Minion will be responsible for SpakKadi’s mental, intellectual, spiritual, and physical well-being. The Chief Minion will assist in coordinating the other minions and act as a sounding board for SpakKadi’s frustrations and ideas. The Chief Minion must be capable of engaging in lively conversations about life, government, religion, politics, society, technology, science fiction, television, movies, and world domination. The Chief Minion must also encourage physical activities for stress relief and physical fitness, and social outings for mental wellness. A sense of humor is required. Experience dealing with intelligent, ambitious women a plus. Must be willing to go extended periods without seeing SpakKadi during school months, I&T, and basketball season. Yes-men and ego-boys need not apply.

Applicants wishing to apply to one or more positions should contact SpakKadi before she becomes too overwhelmed to form coherent sentences.