Fish Net?

If you think you're having a bad day... (picture courtesy of CNN because MSNBC refused to make theirs linkable. So :P).

Well, At Least They Didn't Burn Him at the Stake

Please tell me this one is a joke. That somehow an Onion article oozed into the main stream media. A substitute teacher performs a magic trick in class by making a toothpick disappear... and gets fired after being accused of wizardry. *shakes head* We're doomed.

Never Say Never!

Or at least, I'd image that "never" is in at least one of the 27 phrases banned by a Russian mayor tired of hearing excuses. Yes, that should help encourage people to speak up and offer solutions! I once had a dive coach who didn't allow his students to say things like "can't" or "won't". The theory was similar in that, by disallowing "negative phrases" you also eliminated negative attitudes. Instead, it effectively eliminated my love of diving because I was too afraid to say anything at all to that coach. Now I fear that mayor may be left with the impression that his plan worked because the only people still talking to him would be yes-men eager to tell him everything is hunky-dory, even when it isn't. Management.